The Mom Uniform

I didn't really notice it happen, it just sort of did...  but today I was made very aware of my Mom Uniform.

I'm sure you can picture it.  Those of you who have run into me in the last few months, have witnessed it - it's always the same:

-Hair air dried, or in a pony tail, bun, or under a hat

-T-shirt with a burp cloth or some sort of spit up mark on the left shoulder

-Yoga pants or baggy sweats

-Slip on faded loafers

-No makeup, bags under eyes, and unkempt eyebrows.


I did a quick check in my Mobile uploads just now - and sure enough any picture I've posted in the last bit has me looking exactly like that:

Truth be told, in the picture second from the bottom at the Vet office it was only in that moment shortly after the picture was taken, when I had already spoken with the Vet, and was just waiting to hear about Emmy's test results that I discovered a large spit up stain all over my shoulder and down my sleeve from an unfortunate incident that my washing machine failed to remove.  I still wore that shirt one more time that week before I sprayed it down with stain remover and washed it again. 

The other day I was annoyed that I had to wear my "other" yoga pants because my "going out" yoga pants were in the wash.  I never thought I would ever have "going out yoga pants" but here we are.  It's breaking so many "what not to wear" rules it's not even funny.  Inara on the other hand, always looks adorable in matching outfits, sweaters, hats, and dresses!  

I'm the makeup artist that rarely wears makeup.  I'm the hairstylist who doesn't style her hair!  I have 4 shirts that I rotate - 2 men's XL shirts I bought when I was pregnant from Value Village when I could no longer fit my maternity shirts, and 2 maternity shirts that are extra long.  My body is different now, clothing fits me differently, and until I lose some weight or buy some clothes, I have a uniform.


I didn't really notice my uniform until today, actually.  Today is Valentines Day.  It's just another day to Ben and I, as we never celebrate it, or even acknowledge it more than a text message or funny picture sent between us, but I just so happened to have got my hair cut today, and that made all the difference in how I saw myself.

I got a trim, plus some much needed layering, and then my wonderful stylist curled my hair for me!  I can't really remember the last time I had my hair curled for me, but I can guarantee it was before Inara was born!  But it's amazing what a curling iron can do for your whole outlook!

I left the salon with bouncy curly gorgeous hair that several people complimented me on, and it changed the way I felt for the whole day, so when I came home, I did my makeup put on earrings and a necklace, sprayed a little perfume, put on a real bra (not just a sports bra), and put on a dress!  I also chilled some wine, and made a really nice meal for Ben and I complete with candle light!  Moments before Ben got home I was folding and hanging Inara's clothes in the nursery all done up, and I suddenly had a moment of panic, where I was worried he would think it was weird or silly that I got all dressed up for no reason, and then I would be embarrassed, and for a split second I almost darted back into the our bedroom to put my uniform back on before he arrived.  I know Ben would never say anything but a compliment upon seeing me all done up - but postpardom hormones are a bitch, and they make you a little crazy sometimes.

Sure enough, Ben said I looked great, and complimented my hair, my dress and my earrings, and was thrilled with the dinner I had made.  It's weird, a couple months ago, seeing me in makeup was a daily thing, my hair was always styled in someway - short of a lazy saturday or sunday, and even when I was at my biggest in my pregnancy I was still putting in the effort to look nice:

But these days - I just stick to the uniform.  It just evolved into that I guess.  I started with giving up the straightening iron - I could barely blow dry my hair, let alone have time to staighten it - and forget about the curling iron!  Then my hair didn't even get blow dried anymore, which turned into not even putting product in, or being fine with going out with frizzy flyaway hair.  Then it was a ponytail or bun to keep my hair out of the way (someone is learning to grab onto things that get between her fingers, and she has a sweaty, sticky little grip - so hair up is key) - I actually discovered the other day that my bottom layer of hair has a lot of short broken off hairs from my hair elastics- but I draw the line at scrunchies... save my hair or not - I refuse!

The sweats and over sized shirts just make sense - when Inara was welcomed into the world I still had a large round belly, and lots of extra skin that had taken 9 months to stretch to it's limit - it wasn't about to disappear over night, so I needed to wear bigger sizes to accommodate - as well I was recovering from a C-section, so I needed loose pants with a drawstring waistline that I could wear low so they didn't effect my incision scar while it was healing, and shirts long enough to cover the distance without showing off my lovely stretch marks.  Now a days, the uniform has just been set.  It's easy, it's conveinent, it's comfortable.  It's ugly.

I think that might be part of the whole "losing a part of yourself to Motherhood" that lots of new moms face - bodies change, priorities change, time management changes, and your own cosmetic routines that seemed so ingrained in your daily routine before, ends up taking a backseat to this new bundle of needs.

I was talking to my group of TTC ladies a few weeks back, and mentioned something about Inara, so I snapped a quick picture of her asleep on my shoulder and posted it in our text message chat group, once I looked back at the picture I realized something was missing and added "Don't mind the sports bra, I never got around to putting on a shirt today" my friends laughed, and my picture was met with one my friend posted of her little one on her bare legs with the caption "I didn't put on pants!"  It seems ludicrous to think of someone going the whole day without putting on the most basic of clothing- but to a new mom, it's not so far from the norm.  Some days, I put on clothing just so I won't scare off any unsuspecting neighbours who might have the misfortune of being outdoors when I poke my head out to get the mail!  I still really like my neighbours and still want them to like me - so I will continue to wear shirts when I reach for the weekly flyers.

I hope finding time for curling irons, and makeup gets a little easier as Inara gets a little more independent, or at the very least that I get a little better at my own daily time management.  It seems like such a trivial thing, but it's something I enjoy, and it's something that makes me feel good, and sometimes it's those little feel good things that can change a whole day for the better - like my hair cut today!