The Baby List #2

This is an ongoing segment I'm writing about things I found useful or not in the baby realm.  (take a look at a baby registry sometime, there is an absurd amount of "stuff" for little's these days, and it's hard to know what you need and what you don't - these are some of the things I did and didn't like!

It took many months for me to get some time to write a few more items on my Baby list of what I loved and what I should have skipped when it came to Baby T, but here we are (Finally!)

You can read my first post here:  Clicky clicky


Diapers: 

When I last left you I was talking Diapers - and boy was I ever!  I was about to jump into my Kirkland love affair, so I'll fill you in on what I found with my beloved Costco Brand.  Cheap, and awesome - to sum it up!  We switched to Costco, and never looked back... until recently, but I'll get to that in a second.  They were cost effective - about $35 a box, which gave you around 200 diapers (depending on the size... the bigger the diaper, the less in a box, but the price was always the same).   Very few leak issues, or skin irritations.  I loved them!  I stopped stressing over diapers for a long time there because I finally found the right brand!  Until now.  Now the stress is back mainly because, Inara inherited my full and curvy posterior, and to quote Sir. Mix-a-lot, Baby got Back.  This has been a reason for some leakage in the past as the pocket in the diaper that holds the goods, ends up being filled with fleshy adorable cheeks, causing us to size up prematurely just to accomodate.  This would not be an issue if she was actually wearing the size that the weight range on the box suggests, however due to the abundance of cheek she possesses she's rocking the 35lbs+ size when she's only 28lbs.  The weight written on the box is hardly the issue, except that all diaper manufacturers seem to assume once your kid is in the 35+ range it's time to potty train, so size 6 is as big as they get.  The problem, is that I have an 11 month old wearing size 6, who needs to size up.  And it's too early to start potty training.

So what's a Mama to do?  Well Research first of all.  I discovered that the ONLY brand/style of diaper that is made for anything bigger than a size 6, are Pampers Cruisers, which have a 7.  A very hard to find 7.  Once we finally got our hands on a package we wrapped our little one in the extra large diaper and went about our day, and in true Pampers fashion, it leaked.  All over my jeans.  While I was out with friends.  Turns out, Pampers are still not an "all the time" diaper.  Thankfully when we needed it the most (overnight) it's been pretty awesome, and we are still making due with the Kirkland size 6 diapers during the day.  ***Edited to Add***  So we just discovered Inara appears to be allergic to the Pampers size 7, as she is developing some eczema around her tummy and thighs where the diaper comes into contact with her skin.  Awesome.  Guess it's back to Six's and Leaks.

So it seems for my little one, the Kirkland get too small and leak out the leg holes (overnight mostly), but this is usually solved by sizing up, until you run out of sizes.  The Huggies, although awesome around the legs, seem to be cut for "low rise" baby pants as less then enjoyable matter seems to come up the top at the back.  And Pampers are now great for when she's sleeping, but leak when she's up and moving around (which was the oposite issue back in January when I wrote List #1 - it was the Huggies that worked for night, and Pampers were awesome for Day... go figure!) and give my little bunny a rash.  Costco - I'm begging you, make a size 7.  You had hands down the BEST diapers!!!!!



Moving on then....

Diaper Bags:

I'm a hands free sort of gal.  I don't like purses with the little handles at the top that you have to hold on to, I dislike shoulder bags slightly less and don't even get me started on clutch purses.  My purse is a cross body bag- always has been, always will be.  I like to have my stuff with me, but shifted to my hip or back so it's out of the way.  When it came to Diaper bags my thoughts were no different.  Ben and I picked out a messenger style bag by Jolly Jumper.  I was adamant I wanted cross body, Ben wanted something non-girly/frilly and the one I happened to look at had stroller straps, so bonus!  Turns out, it was perfect!!!

My little bug outgrew her infant car seat when she was 3 months old, meaning rather than tucking her into her little seat in the house, carrying her to the car in one hand, and just clicking the seat into place in the car and heading out for the day, we now have to carry her in our arms along with everything else we need with us to the car, and then get her into her seat there.  It's kind of a pain.  Especially since Inara is not the cuddly type - she likes to look around, and for months when you picked her up, she would lean back and whip her head around to see everything she could see.  It was definitely a two hand job to get her to the car, and I didn't have any extra arms for shifting a diaper bag strap back up onto my shoulder as I fumble for my keys.  The cross body messenger style is such a life saver!  I have a routine now - when I am getting ready to go out, I get Inara all ready in her coat and shoes and put her in a place I can easily grab her (it used to be on the floor, but now she's a crawler, so I usually stand her up in the play pen).  Then I put my jacket on, cross my purse over my body, cross the diaper bag over in the same way, take my keys out and put them in my right pocket to lock the door (or tuck them in the band of my pants if I don't have pockets) shift the whole load behind me, and pick up Inara.  This way the bags are with me, but out of the way.  Several times I've been hooked on the back screen door as I try to leave, but I feel that would happen with any other style of bag too.   I can also fully strap Inara into her car seat in the car before even taking off the bags too, as they are behind me and out of my way!

The stroller straps have been awesome too!  My diaper bag has two 6" long straps hanging off of the main shoulder strap with snaps on either end to clip to your stroller - then the diaper bag hangs just under your stroller handle leaving the under storage area free for shopping bags or your purse.  It also makes it super easy to change Inara in public because everything is right where you need it and super accesible rather than having to dig under the bottom of the stroller seat while holding a squirming kid with the other hand!

All in all - LOVE this bag!

Baby Clothes: 

I buy all of Inara's clothes second hand.  All of them.  Kids are expensive!  If I can cut costs some where it's going to be on clothing that she will only wear once or twice!  I scour the "baby buy and sell" pages like a hawk, and now and then when I see a post for a large lot of baby girl clothes, provided the size fits, I'm on it!  It's in this way that I bought 3 laundry baskets of clothing for $60 before Inara was born, and then most recently got another massive garbage bag for just $50.  All in all I think I've only spent about $300 in total on all of her clothes!  Anything I can't get in large hauls through the buy and sell pages, I find at Value Village.  Just the other day I scored some awesome warm winter clothes, jackets, boots and hats for Inara there for just a few dollars.  Give them a good wash, and they are good as new!  Especially considering at this age, baby clothes are not super lived in - kids are typically only in things for a couple months at most, and then it's a new size.  I let other mom's buy brand new, and then I scoop in to buy the used clothes off of them for super cheap!  My daughter still looks super adorable, and I save a ton of cash!  This was especially helpful when my daughter was sizing up every 3 weeks, and growing at an alarming rate!  


Speaking of Baby clothes....

Baby Leggings:

I swear by these things!  It's the same as Yoga pants for adults!  They keep you warm, are suitable as pants in public situations, and they stretch to allow comfortable movement if you have an extra couple of pounds you are working with!  As a result of Inara growing so quickly she has ended up in sizes long before she reached the age that go with the size.  Baby sizing starts with months - Preemie, 0-3mo, 3-6mo, 6-9mo, 9-12mo, 12-18mo, 18-24mo and then 2T, 3T 4, 5, 6 before getting into Small, Medium Large etc.   These sizes are supposed to coincide with their ages, but my little girl hit 2T when she was 7 months old.  As a result I found that when I bought 2T jeans or pants they often were straight leg, or narrow in the thigh to accomodate a skinny toddler running around having burned off all their baby chub once they started running.  But since I was dressing my chubby baby still, her legs would not fit in a lot of pants.  Enter the Leggings.  Leggings have been amazing for Inara!  I dressed her exclusively in leggings and stretchy shorts for the whole summer until she started slimming out around 10.5 months of age and jeans started fitting her a little better!  Jeggings (leggings that look like Denim jeans) are an abomination on teens/adults, but they are adorable on babies!

Tranquil Turtle:

This was a baby gift from a good friend, and ended up being a super valuable item in our nursery!!  This turtle shines a moving blue light on the walls and ceiling that mimics the reflection water gives off, as well as plays an ocean wave sound, and a little soothing tune.  When Inara figured out standing, that's all she wanted to do - all day, every day.  No naps were had, and bedtime was 3+ hours of constantly trying to lay her back down, only for her to pop up moments later amused with her new skill.  Enter the turtle.  Out of sheer frustration one night after a week of her new no-sleep routine, Ben turned on the turtle and put it in her crib.  Inara still stood for a while, but also kept looking back at the turtle as she was interested in the colors and sounds coming from it.  The next day for nap time I turned on the turtle again, and this time she sat with the turtle in her lap and eventually laid down and slept.  The turtle was enough of a new distraction to keep her sitting in her crib rather than standing, and when she was seated she was close enough to lay down and sleep - where as with standing she kept jumping and pulling herself up, so her exhaustion had no hope of taking over.  I love that turtle.  It worked for weeks!  (of course nothing works every time!  Kids like the switch up the routine as soon as you think you've got it figured out!)



Okay.... I've been writing this thing for a while now, and my brain is turning to mush as I type, so I think I'm done for this round of Baby List!!!  Until next time!

Budget 101 with the Thiesons

We love our budget.  It works, we know where we stand financially at any time, and we are always prepared for everything from a car repair to a quick weekend away.  Over the years I've had a few friends ask me about our budget, and I've decided to just put it all down on "paper" for all to see (minus a few of the personal financial details of course...)

Our budget took a long time to work out the kinks, and it was inspired by one of our favorite shows "Till debt do us part".  On the show, families are taught to live on cash, and work with jars to ensure they do not go over their spending, and they follow a system of "if you don't have the cash, you don't make the purchase" which is a very smart way to go.  Credit can be both an amazing and awful tool depending on how to use it (more on that later).  Here's how Ben and I work the Moo-la.

When I set to making our budget I first looked up Till Debt to us Part and took at look at a few of the resources that they use on the show.  I found a spread sheet that you plug your numbers into, and it tells you what you should put in each "jar" to make your budget work.  Unfortunately I found the spreadsheet a little too simplistic, so I set to making my own.

I opened up Excel and I made several rows with the headings of our "jars" Housing, Transportation, Life, and Savings.

At the top I listed my Pay cheque (after taxes) and Ben's pay cheque.  I then broke them columns into starting with Yearly, Monthly, and Bi-weekly.  

Then I started filling in the set bills we pay on a monthly basis in their appropriate category, the ones that tend to always be the same amount:

Mortgage/ Property Tax
Car/house insurance
Car Payments
Utilities (Gas/Electric/Cable/Home phone)
Cell phone(s)
Medical (Blue Cross)
RRSP

Then I collected numbers from both my bank account, and Ben's Bank account and put together our variable spending.  Things like "Entertainment" "Gas" "Vacation" "Pets" "Gifts/Clothing" "Groceries" etc and filled in absolutely everything else we could possibly need to spend money on.  Then I played with the totals in our "jars" until I had something that worked.  It took several weeks for the numbers to really work, but in the end we figured out a budget that balanced and covered all our needs.  It ended up looking like this:

Housing:
    Mortgage/Property Tax
    Insurance/Licence (house and car)
    Utilities (gas and power)
    Repairs (house)

Transportation:
    Gas/Oil
    Repairs
    Car Loan

Life:
    Groceries/Pet
    Entertainment
    Clothes
    Family/Gifts
    Bank Fees
    Medical/Dental
    Cell phones
    Cable/Internet/Home Phone

Savings:
    Vacation
    RRSP
    Inara
    Joint Savings
    Education

Once we had our jars figured out, we then had to put the system into practice, however we hate working in cash (mostly because we have next to no time to run to the bank each pay day to fill up our jars) but we are both RBC customers, and they have an amazing system of online savings accounts.  So Ben and I created about 10 different savings accounts that we share between us to act as our jars:

House
Car
Life
Groceries
Entertainment
Savings
Inara
Inara Education
Vacation
Misc

We broke down Savings and Life a little more when it came to the accounts just because we needed to be able to see exactly what we were able to spend when it came to Inara, Groceries, Vacation, Entertainment and Education.  Misc is an account that changes it's name all the time - currently it's called "Christmas" as we toss any extra's we end up with in there to put money away for Christmas spending.

In having our money all laid out like this, it really helps us plan for the future as well as live in the now. For example, since we put a set amount into our Entertainment account each month, when someone invites us out for dinner, or a movie, we can first take a look at the account, and figure out if A, we have enough money for the outing  and B, if we were saving up that money for something further down the line, and can decide from there.   For instance, our dear friend Athena is in a play in October and Ben and I are definitely going to attend, but since our Entertainment account took a beating from our most recent Calgary trip, we know we can't make any other plans from that account between now and Athena's play to be able to afford the tickets.

As well after a long while of stocking up our House account, when a hail storm hit us last summer breaking chunks of our shingles off, we had the money put aside for a new roof this spring.  I can't imagine how we would have afforded to replace such a necessity while I was collecting Mat Leave had we not planned in advance.

Then we added another aspect - points.  Ben and I are huge fans of collecting Visa reward points, Optimum points, and Air Miles.  We figure if we are going to spend the money anyway, we might as well get a little bonus along the way.  For example, Ben and I have bought two flat screen TV's with Visa Reward points, racked up from putting our Wedding and 2 years of spending on our Visa - we buy absolutely everything possible with our Visa (and pay it off out of the "jars" each pay period)- then when we have enough points, we cash them in for Future Shop Gift Cards, and watch for a Sale on TV's.  It also helps to shop around Christmas for the really good deals.  As well we collect Air Miles with some of our purchases, which we then cash in for Movie Tickets that we use to take some of the pressure off our Entertainment account.  As for the Optimum Points, I'm a makeup artist, each year I spend a small fortune at Shoppers Drug Mart on Makeup, Hair accessories, Hair spray etc etc.  Once I get to my 95,000 shoppers optimum points I can cash them in to buy up to $170 worth of merchandise with my points - but if I wait for Redemption Weekends (usually at least once a month) they give you an extra $50 if you cash in - which is $220, which I use to buy two flats of baby formula for my hypoallergenic child (which usually totals $275, and only covers about a month of her food).  

As well we look for deals in everything we do.  When we moved, we wanted to set up Cable with Telus, and took advantage of a deal when their Optic Cable came out, and got a brand new Xbox when we signed up.  We also buy our tools during Fathers Day weekend, when Home Depot has the best deals, and stock up on any sort of decorating items (christmas lights/halloween stuff etc) after the season passes when they are a ridiculously good deal (I bought a Christmas Wreath for my front door for $2 from Michaels on Christmas Eve).

As for planning out Groceries, we are not above buying a truckload of well priced meats or items when they are on for a great deal, and I am getting much better at planning meals based off of what I have, rather than buying groceries based off of what I want to make.

It's taken us a long time to figure these things out, and I think we are in a place now where our budget is working for us more than we are working for it.  Especially with not going back to my full time job, and choosing to stay home with Inara - if we want to make this work - we have to stick to the budget, and I honestly could not picture being able to do this without it.

I hope for those of you who read this, you picked up on a few tips, or maybe you have a few of your own to share with us - I am always looking for better ways to stretch a dollar!  If you have any questions, feel free to ask!  I'm pretty proud of our budget, and I like sharing my knowledge!




   

I won the Lottery

I'm going to break the rules here.  I'm going to tell you what I wish for every time I blow out candles on a cake, or when I see a shooting star, blow the fluff off a dandelion  or any other time I'm giving the option to close my eyes and make a wish.

I want to win the Lottery.

Now I know as soon as you tell it won't come true, but I don't fear that anymore, because it already has come true!  Haven't you heard?  I won!  In fact, I've won several times!

First, I won the Husband Lottery!  Ben is everything I could have ever asked for in a partner!  I know it's cliche, but it's the only way I can express this correctly: I married my best friend.  From the very start to my day when his alarm goes off, and the first thing he does is quickly turn it off so it doesn't wake me, and then scootch over and give me a kiss on the forehead or cheek (sometimes I'm awake anyway) before getting out of bed to get ready for work.  He spoils me with love and laugher and never misses a moment to act like a complete goof to make me smile.  We work well together, as parents, as house cleaners as construction workers.  We dance around the kitchen while we make dinner together, we take about interesting science articles as we clean up after, we play games while we fold laundry (he always tries to shake the sheet from my grasp when we are folding them, or he plays goalie for his sock drawer as I try to throw the bundled up socks in), we go for walks together and talk about our future, we discuss Marvel movies while drywalling our garage - we talk about everything and anything.  He gives me hugs from behind when I'm working at the sink, and I give him top of the head kisses when he's on his computer.  I've never in my life felt more loved in every way.  He supports me and my interests, getting up at 5:30am just to cheer me on in my first 5km run, and he's always excited to see photos of the makeup and hair I've done.  He works extra hard to provide for Inara and I so that I can stay home with her during the day, and live out my dream of being a full time mom and hair and makeup artist.  He loves to surprise me, and goes above and beyond to plan little romantic gestures that he knows will make me cry (happy tears of course!).  He's the best father I could ever ask for for our daughter and never turns up his nose at changing a diaper, or getting our little one dressed - he even puts the little hair clips in her hair too!  He has my whole heart, and I couldn't give it to a better person.  My Ben is everything I have ever wanted in a Husband or partner - I won the lottery.

Next, I won the Business Partner Lottery!  Melissa is amazing.  I say it all the time, and never once have I ever felt that "Amazing" is a good enough word to describe just how highly I think of this girl.  Her photography is second to no one, and she has a heart of gold!  Not only did I manage to find Edmonton's BEST photographer, but she picked me to work with her!  AND she's one of my very best friends!  Melissa is so easy to talk to, and she's fun to work with!  Neither of us feel like we are working when we get together for a shoot, and our clients echo the same sentiments - what we do, is fun!  And I can only atribute it to the incredible chemistry Melissa and I have together.  We speak the words of beauty insanely well, and when we get together to collaborate on a shoot the creative juices start flowing and we end up bouncing idea after idea off of each other until a "little project" has become an incredible masterpiece!  Melissa and I clicked from the first moment we met, and I'm always excited to work with her and see her.  She's one of the best people I know and I'm so lucky to have her in my life - I won the lottery.

I also won the friend lottery.  Several times in fact.  From my boys back in Calgary who always accepted I was "one of the boys" and there was no place I would rather be that in a pub watching hockey with them, to my girls who share my unique sense of adventure and are always up for crazy, stupid, hilarious, ideas, that usually get us into trouble but always give us an awesome story to tell.  And the new friends I’ve met in Edmonton, people who knew went out of their way to welcome me, and make me feel included.  People who message me within moments of me posting a frustrated status on facebook just to check if everything is okay.  People who always offer services to babysit to give Ben and I a date night without us ever having to ask first.  I also have friends online, miles apart but no more than a message away, friends who have become closer to me than people I used to see every day.  People who were always there for me when I was stressed out, needed advice or had good news to share.  I have a large group of caring, thoughtful, intelligent, fun, generous, loving friends in my life that I have stories with, I’ve cried with, I’ve laughed until I cried with, and always fill my heart with so much love after seeing or talking to them.  I won the Lottery. 

I cannot forget my family win too – I won that too, I know, I’m like… super lucky!  There is such a stigma about the “In-laws” or the “Mother in Law” in which it seems the amount of people in this world who actually really love and enjoy the company of their in-laws is so few and far between, but not this chick.  My in-laws are some of the kindest, most loving, caring people I’ve ever met!  I’m not just saying that either.  Ben has such a close relationship with his parents, and I clearly understand why!  A day at Mom and Dad’s place is usually filled with drinks, great food, a little bit of picking on Dad, Mom piping in with “that’s what she said” and lots of stories and laughs.  Often Ben and I will go see Ben’s parents as our “night out”.  Mom is one of the easiest people to talk to, and she will often give me a call during the day just to check in, and chat!  She feels more like a girlfriend to me!  Dad gives some of the best hugs, and always has a pun or some sagely advice for whatever you might be discussing!  They have helped us in more ways that I can count!!  Moving us, helping paint, renovations, projects, babysitting – Mom and Dad are always there for us, and always go above and beyond.  They once volunteered to come paint our bedroom while we were at work to help us get ready to sell our Condo!  We weren’t even there!  Ben’s parents are some of the best people I know, and I’m so thankful that I get to call them Mom and Dad.  There’s a saying “You can pick your friends, but you can’t pick your family”  I couldn’t have picked better in-laws had I tried!  I won the Lottery. 

Last, but certainly not least – I won the Baby Lottery.  I didn’t even know such a thing existed, but here I am!  I’m going to put on my bragging Mom hat here, but seriously – my child is perfect.  Inara is such a happy baby, she’s calm, she’s focused, and she loves to smile and laugh.  When she was 4 weeks old we discovered she had an allergy to cows milk protein in her formula, know how we knew?  She was a little bit fussy.  Yup.  That’s it.  Inara didn’t really cry, and never fussed usually, so when she seemed a little bit upset or agitated that tipped us off that there was something wrong.  I felt like a crazy mom going into the Stollery telling the doctor “she’s a little bit fussy” and trying to have them take me seriously, but she was such a calm quiet baby that “a little bit fussy” was cause for alarm.  THAT’S how good we had it!!  When Inara was 2 weeks old and had gained all her birth weight and lots more, we were told we could go to on-demand feedings.  Immediately she started giving us 4 hour chunks.  By 6 weeks old she was giving us 6 hours, and by 8 week we were getting a solid 8 out of her.  At 9 weeks old we were getting 10-12 hours a night, and it’s been that way since.  She puts herself to sleep most of the time, and aside from a couple weeks in July when she went through a weird phase, she’s out at the latest by 8pm.  We used to visit friends and bring the Pack & Play with us, and once Inara was asleep, we were free to stay as long as we liked, and be as loud as we wanted to – Inara slept through everything (including a very loud screening of the original Fast and the Furious Movie in the next room!).  When she was 5 months old we went to Mexico, and while waiting to board the plane to come back to Edmonton Inara fell asleep, so we made a little bed on our carry-on luggage for her to sleep on.   While she was sleeping we kept getting very loud obnoxious intercom announcements overhead that blared in our ears.  Finally after 30 minutes of announcements in both English and Spanish one of our travel companions said “What I want to know is – how is that Baby still sleeping, and what kind of black magic is this that I can apply to when I have a child in the future?”  She’s awesome.  It’s rare that she cries when she wakes, and the first thing we see in the morning is her grin ear to ear, and the last thing we see at night is that same grin as she waves good night.  This may mean that our next child might be the complete opposite, but right now, when it comes to Inara – I won the lottery. 

I’ve been very fortunate in my life – not always mind you, it hasn't always been flowers and rainbows, and I have had my share of disappointment and heartache, but I feel like these days I really have no complaints in the way my life has turned out.  It’s all been worth it to this point.   Every lame boyfriend, or fair-weather friend has just been a lottery ticket that didn’t pan out – all leading up to where I am these days. 

I won. 

Learning to Run

I am a runner.

I put on clothing containing some percentage of spandex and or Luon (whatever that is) and I laced up my shoes and ran - there for, I'm a runner.  Right?  That's how it works right?  I thought so anyway.

2 years ago I decided I wanted to be a runner, so I did just that - I went outside, and I ran....  a few houses anyway, I was wheezing pretty hard by the end of the block, and for the rest of my run I was a walker.  Next time would be better though...

Nope.  Same thing.

I would plug in my headphones, turn on my running app, and go for as long as I possibly could before I ended up slowing to a walk panting and wheezing and dying for several blocks.  Then once I felt like I had regained enough of my lung capacity I would run again, for as far and as long as I could before slowing to a sputtering, limping, gasping slow pace.  I did this for an entire summer, and I called myself a runner!  I even thought I was getting better!  In looking back though - I was pretty much doing the same thing each time without any improvement of time or distance.  As well, every time I ran I would have blisters between my toes, and shin splints in my legs, but runners get those right?

At the end of 2011, I got a pair of Vibrams in an effort to fix the blister problem, and the first time I ran in them in 2012, I discovered in the first few steps the cause of my shin splints.  Turns out I had a really hard strike on my heel when I ran, and rather than keeping my weight on top of the ball of my foot with each step, I was instead reaching my legs out far in front of me and striking with my heel - causing the shin splints.  I couldn't feel it when I had my runners on, but with Vibrams there is less between you and the concrete, so you are more aware of how you are stepping.  By the end of that run I had corrected my step, and I never got shin splints from a run again!  Who knew there was a form to this running business?!

That's about all I can report of my 2012 running season though, because by the time the snow melted I was already sporting this belly:

Which bounced with each step and it hurt to run.  2012 - I was a walker.

This year though - this year I'm a runner again.  I'm so much of a runner, that I signed up for my very first 5k!  (I've never "run" more than 3ish k before)  I was so nervous registering for that run, that I had butterflies, and I was shaking!  eep!  Especially since I filled out the form before the snow melted, and not only had I not run since fall 2011 - but I had just had a baby and was only just getting back into any sort of exercise.

As soon as the days got warm enough to bring Inara out in the stroller I strapped on the Vibrams and off I went full tilt, followed by a puff, cough, and sputter.  I figured I was doing pretty good, for it being my first time back, so I went again the next day, and then the next - same thing each time.  Then I went the next week, and the week after that!  Then... well, then I walked for a bit.  I had to get some groceries one day, and I had to pick up the dry cleaning the next time, and then I didn't even walk - Inara was not napping properly so I didn't want to screw with her sleep schedule by taking her out in the stroller to run - before I knew it, I had less than a month to train for this 5k, and I realized I really needed to get my ass in gear!!

With a new resolution to destroy that 5k away I went!  I made it 1.5k and was wheezing and cramping so bad I headed home early.  When I got in the door I admitted defeat and texted my friend Lisa to ask for advice.  Lisa is no stranger to running shoes, and has many a race of her own under her belt (and she's Hot).  I told her that my endurance sucked and I needed advice.  I had been trying to run the whole 5k and just improve on the time I did it in - but Lisa told me to master a shorter distance before trying to run the whole length - immediately that sounded good to me!  I had been dreading running because I was really starting to feel like I sucked at it, and no one likes to do things they aren't good at!  I didn't feel anything like a runner - I felt like a chubby wannabe puffing and panting my way around my neighbourhood, a spectacle for the people pruning their hedges and mowing their lawns.  Then Lisa gave me the best advice so far, she told me to never max out on my run shift - meaning to never run as much as I possibly could before walking.  If I could run for 3.5 minutes before I needed to walk, then alternate running 3 minutes and walking one.  By running for less than I could, I actually end up doing better!  When I think of running, I think of someone running the entire time, and perhaps there are people that do that - but Lisa said that even running as much as she does, she still does walking shifts.  I had no idea!  I just thought you did the walking shifts until you get to a point where you can run the full time!

I clearly don't know much about this whole running business, and there does seem to be more to it than lacing on a pair of shoes.

Of course I'm really not a great runner at all, so I do a 1 minute run, 1 minute walk.  I did it tonight for the first time and went 2.6 km, and I felt amazing!  I realized that I didn't reach my "oh my god I want to die, just walk the rest" stage until I was almost home, but even then I still ran and walked those last minutes because I kept telling myself "it's only a minute, it's just a minute" the whole time!  I walked in the door with a huge smile on my face!  I felt like I ran the distance, the distance didn't run me!

Funny how 2 years into my quest to become a runner I finally discovered how to run!  I'm going to stick to my 1min/1min lap for a week before attempting a 2min/1min and keep building up from there.

I'm not expecting to break any records on my 5k race, I know now that I have a lot to learn, and it's going to take me a little more than 3 weeks to build up my endurance to get to my 5k with a decent running time, but the fact that I finally learned HOW to get there makes me feel like I already won!  It seems like a silly enough thing, but for someone built for strength rather than speed (runners legs I have not) it's one of those plateau breaking sort of moments when something finally clicks and you can take your workout to the next level - it feels damn good!

So to my dear (and Hot) friend Lisa - THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!  You have given me a new love for running all over again!  I'll see you at the Finish line!

Pregnancy Insider Info (Part One)

This last week a dear friend of mine found out she was expecting her first baby, and with most pregnancy excitement comes questions - lots of questions.  As I was fielding a few of them, I was told "You need to write this stuff down, I bet lots of people would want to know this!"  ...so here it is!

I'm not saying I'm the authority, not in the least, however I do have a sort of "tell it like it is" mentality, and in the past people have expressed that they value the insider info I have given them - just keep in mind, any and all information I have regarding pregnancy, birth, and post birth is all my own experiences and research I've done.  That's the thing, you can read about my thoughts on pregnancy, but these things were all specific to me - we are all different people, we all have different pregnancies. That being said, when I was pregnant I found getting the real deal experiences from other mom's was far more valuable than anything my doctor could tell me!  So here goes!

Just so I'm not jumping all over the map, I'll try to write things as I think of them starting with the beginning, and following a pregnancy timeline.

So - you've discovered you're pregnant (or not - just play along)... Congrats!  First things first - Celebrate.  While it's true that miscarriage  or other issues are a possibility, you will make yourself sick if you spend your whole nine months stressing and worrying, and at the end of the day, you will look back and regret not taking more time to enjoy the little things!  When you see those double lines on that plastic test, allow yourself to squeal, cry happy tears and hug your partner!  This is supposed to be a happy time!  Live in that moment - there are countless woman and men all over the world praying for that very second that you are currently standing in - don't let it slip by without giving it some happiness!

Now....

 I don't mean to burst your bubble, but the first few weeks are the rough ones, there are times when something doesn't go right and your body terminates the pregnancy through no fault of your own - often it just understands that something wasn't mixed right, or the blue prints are missing something important.  This is why you usually find out someone is expecting when they are about 12 weeks along.  12 weeks is the golden mark - the beginning of the 2nd trimester, and although you aren't out of the woods, things are a little clearer.  I would suggest only keeping your announcement list short in those first few weeks for this reason - I know you want to shout it from the rooftops (believe me I know) but if something were to happen, it's a much smaller group of people that you have to give the news to later on.

6 weeks is usually when the nausea kicks in.  For me, it was 6 weeks to the day.  I was totally fine one day, the next, I'm feeling like throwing up because Ben cooked stirfry with onions for dinner!  From 6 weeks on, my taste buds and sense of smell were not my own.  So if I can offer you any advice - if you are just in the early stages of pregnancy - eat.  Eat everything.  Have all your favorites!  I found from 6 weeks on, I couldn't do steak - couldn't even smell it cooking (Much to my husbands dismay).  Fish either - bleh.  The only time I truly thought I was going to throw up during my pregnancy was when Ben served me fish for dinner one night.  My mom told me she couldn't have "red sauce" (Spaghetti, curry etc) it was too acidic and would make her have serious heartburn.  Eat all that stuff early.... just in case.

For me personally, I found my nausea was almost exclusively "Hunger Nausea" I would suddenly get so sick between meals - so I found I needed to prepare my life and keep cereal at work, crackers in the car, and candies in my purse.  A pregnant woman should always ALWAYS carry food with her, even if you are just running out for a quick errand.  One day we were driving from Edmonton to Fort Sask to have lunch with Ben's parents (about a 30 min drive) about 5 minutes into the drive I got hungry.  Now for those of you who don't know - there is a HUGE difference between Hungry, and Pregnancy Hungry.  When you are hungry, it can usually take you an hour or two to go from "yeah, I could eat" to "I'm starving!"  For a pregnant woman you go from "I think I need to eat something" to "I'm going to knaw off your arm if you don't get me food right this second" in about 4 minutes flat.  Ben laughed at me because about 2 minutes after expressing I was hungry, I started frantically searching the car, and looking in the glove box in hopes that I would find some forgotten hard candy, or some crackers.  2 minutes after that, I made him stop so we could get something.  It literally happens that fast!  I could go from "Thanskgiving Dinner Full" to "Missed Lunch, and starving" in 30 minutes.

When I first got pregnant I actually lost weight in the first few weeks, because I was trying not to do the whole "I'm eating for two" thing and gorge on food (since they tell you you actually only need about 200 more calories to account for baby), but as it turns out - I needed to increase my calories quite a bit more, as I've been dieting for so many years my body naturally runs on fewer, and the baby took them all - meaning I always felt like I was running on empty!  Of course there is a difference between increasing calories with Oreos and with lean protein and veggies - make the right choice, you are responsible for feeding your baby, and there's nothing like giving your newborn Oreos.

And on the topic of healthy nutrition, do you know why you are told to cut back on caffeine during pregnancy?  It's because caffeine cancels out the calcium in your body, and your baby needs calcium for proper brain development.  So in those beginning stages, if you do opt for a coffee now and then, ensure that you are matching it with a tall glass of milk!  Speaking of which, have you heard about those woman who have their babies kick so hard they crack ribs?  It's not just because they are growing super babies - but more so that their little one has taken all the calcium in their body for it's own development, and your own bones end up a little more on the fragile side.  When you are pregnant, you need to triple the amount of calcium you are consuming because baby always gets first dibs of everything - you get what's left over.  I went through so much milk, cheese and yogurt during my pregnancy I probably could have gotten a bulk discount at a dairy farm!

You will also run at a higher temperature in the coming months - AC is important, so is large rubbermaid bins with cold water in them that you can cool your feet in on hot days.  If you need to sleep with the window open, the AC on, and a fan going - do it - Hubby can have an extra blanket.  I was pregnant during the summer, and from June through to October I didn't sleep in anything more than my own skin, nor did I even have a sheet on me.  I typically run at a higher temperature pre-pregnancy, but my little bean had the same issue going on, and our combined heat made me feel a little feverish. Even in November when I was waiting for Inara's arrival, Mom and Dad would visit and bring sweaters and slippers, where as, I was waddling around in shorts and a tank top with my heat set at 18 degrees.

Your body will change.  This is a given, but did you know your hair and skin will change too?  Your feet will get bigger, your hips wider, your skin will produce more oil, your hair thicker, your forehead, neck, back, shoulders, cleavage and chin will all breakout, and you'll be dropping absolutely everything!  The reason for this is Hormones.  The extra oil is produced to help your skin stretch  (dry skin being stretched hurts!) this is that "glow" everyone is talking about.  I found I just looked greasy, and having lived my whole life with extremely dry skin, I didn't know how to handle this new found oil - my skin didn't either, hence the breakouts!  Another perk to dry skin is very few acne issues - but oil = pimples, and they are everywhere!  The bigger hips, feet and loose grip is a result of your body loosening your ligaments to make way for baby.  I don't know the scientific terms for everything, but basically your body releases a hormone that stretches all of your ligaments - this allows your pelvis to seperate, your hips to slide out to enlarge the birth canal, and everything seems to rearrange to make way.  Unfortunately this hormone isn't just lower equator specific, and you will find you are dropping everything you try to grasp, as your hands no longer have a tight grip on things.  I once dropped a curling iron on a client while I was doing her hair - I was mortified, but having just had a baby of her own, she was completely understanding, and thankfully didn't get burnt!

As for the thicker hair - well, that's just awesome.  No idea why it happens.  I'm sure there is some scientific explanation  but I don't recall stumbling across it during any of my reading.  Either way, it doesn't matter why it happens, just enjoy is while you can.  The odd thing is, I didn't just get thick hair - I got straight hair.  I went from a head full of corkscrew curls, to not even needing to plug in the straightener before heading out for the day!  A lot of moms I asked had their hair change slightly, from looser waves to a little curlier, or vice versa, but so far none have encountered a change as drastic as my own.   I'm hoping Inara took a few of my curls, but my mom told me I was 2 before any sort of curl showed itself, so I guess I have a bit of time to wait yet.

Once you get well into your pregnancy, there's not really anything to report - just take each day at a time, embrace your waddle, and try to keep as active as possible - leg cramps suck - eat bananas and make sure you drink lots of water (yes I know that increases the frequency of your bathroom trips - but it's better than middle of the night calf muscle cramps - trust me.  Your husband will thank you too).  Oh, speaking of water - never drink the full 4 eight ounce cups of water before your ultrasounds.  I had 4 ultrasounds in my pregnancy, and each time they had to get me to go pee so they could clearly see the baby - my bladder was too full and it was squishing her.  You are pregnant, your bladder is smaller at the best of times!  I think 4 cups is the requirement for non preggo's, and they didn't realize they should adjust the quantity for pregnant woman,  Go for 3 cups - it's enough, and you will be less angry when they make you sit in the waiting room for 15 minutes before your appointment.  Your husband will thank you.

Oh - that's another thing, this is his baby too - let him come to the prenatal appointments to hear the heartbeat, and go to every ultrasound to see them squirm and wriggle - they can't feel them inside, so this is a way for them to experience their childs life before they are born too!  I also told Ben right off the bat, that I needed him to be with me just on the off chance we were ever told bad news - I would need the support, and there is no way I would be able to drive myself home after hearing something was wrong.  Thankfully we never got bad news, but I was happy to have Ben by my side through everything anyway.

A Note for the Husbands:

At this point in her life, that awesome cool, chill person you fell in love with is gone.  She is emotional, she is high strung, she will burst into tears if you deny her a food she's been craving.  She's also no longer in control of her vesel.  If your "I'll eat anything" wife suddenly becomes the pickiest eater on the planet - take it in stride.  Don't get mad at her, she can't help what tastes good, and what makes her want to go tearing down the hall to the bathroom.  I know you spent all afternoon preparing her your special signature dish only for her to just want a PB&J sandwich, she's not doing it to offend you - I promise.  As well, I know you are only trying to do whats best, but if you make a single comment about how much weight your wife has put on at any point in her pregnancy, she will go Black Widow on your ass.  At one point at my bi-weekly checkups, a male intern came in to talk to me before my OB arrived, and noticed the 7 pound jump in weight I had between my appointments, and said "we're concerned that you have put on too much weight, so if you could not gain anymore that would be great".  This particular week was the +35 degree week that hit Edmonton where I was retaining so much fluid my ankles packed up and left town, and I was only 20 weeks into my pregnancy (having only gained 16 pounds total).  That comment ate at me for months!  I stewed about it, talked about it, and rationalized my weight gain to Ben again and again, until finally Ben told me if he ever saw that guy again - he will take him out to the hall to have a little chat with him.  Calling a pregnant woman fat is the WORST thing you could do - even in a joking manner.  Your wife has a great sense of humour, but along with her taste buds, her emotions are not her own either, and considering she's already gaining weight at an alarming rate (something most woman spend plenty of their lives trying to prevent from happening) she's more than a little sensitive about her size, and she will not find the humour in making a beeping noise when she steps back, or suggesting a moo moo when she laments about not fitting clothes.  Don't do it.  Be sensitive to this crazy hormonal time in her life.  Your wife will thank you.



....To Be Continued.... (I have so much more to say, and this is already a long post, so I'll save the rest for another writing session!)

My 5 month old

Inara is 5 months old.  How did she get to be 5 months old?  The days seem to be flying by, and I feel I need to write some things down before I forget all of the amazing things that we have experienced this first year!

So here's a 5 month recap!

Inara was born November 8th 2012, the day after a wicked snow storm.  She was brought into the world by C-section, and after 3 long days in the hospital, we were allowed to go home.

Shortly after that we discovered I was unable to breastfeed and she had lost a whole pound from her birth weight.

But once we put her on formula, she grew like a weed! 

At 9 days old she was 8 pounds 3 ounces, having grown 13 ounces in just three days on formula. 

At 10 days old we visited Auntie Melissa who did New Born photos of her, and she slept the whole time, and was a great subject:

From 2-4 weeks old Inara slept 3-4 hours at a time, but since she was formula fed, Ben and I traded off feedings so we each got longer chunks of time to sleep.  She would go to bed around 11-12am, and then Ben would do the feeding at 3am, and I would do it at 5:30am.

At 4 weeks old we discovered blood in Inara's diapers, and after a visit to the stollery and several consultations with nurses we finally had our Pediatrician diagnose a Cows Milk Protein allergy, and at 6 weeks old, Inara was put on a hypoallergenic formula.  As well at 4 weeks Inara started smiling.

Also at 6 weeks old, she was already wearing 6 month old clothing, and I had packed up all the 0-3 month clothes.  

Once we switched her formula's she started sleeping for 5 and 6 hours at a time, and on Jan 2nd (Ben's first day back to work after the Christmas holidays) Inara slept 8 straight hours. 

At 9 weeks Inara started sleeping 12 hours at night most every night, with the occasional night of only 8 hours.

At 10 weeks old, Inara was moved into 9 month sleepers and was maxing the doctors charts with 99th percentile for weight, 97th for height and 98th for head size.  She grew a pound+ a week for the first 10 weeks.

At 13 weeks old Inara outgrew her 9month sleepers and needed 12 month sleepers.  We were cycling through clothing at an alarming rate so I finally sent out a plea to moms through facebook for anyone who had sleepers they could let me borrow for a couple weeks.  Thankfully I have amazing friends and I recived an outpouring of clothing and gifts to help me through!

At 14 weeks, Inara was figuring out her hands, and started putting everything in her mouth, and was sleeping in a routine where she would nap for 2-3 hours a day, allowing Mom to finally get some things done around the house, and get better at timing chores and meals.

Around 15 weeks we had her in the Jolly Jumper, and it fast became one of her favorite activities

At about 17 weeks she started to develop a real laugh, and is adamant that she wants to sit up all the time.  Inara will only lay in a reclined position while she is drinking, but the second you pull the bottle away, you need to sit her up, or she kicks her legs, tenses her abs and squeals to be upright! 

Inara also started slowing down the growth spurts during this time.  Her 12 month sleepers lasted 6 weeks rather than just 3 before needing to size up!

19 weeks - 18 month sleepers

At 20 weeks Inara started teething to the point of screaming in the evenings and just wanted to be held all day - poor girl :(

At 21 weeks, she was still working on sitting up, but her tummy time has come a very long way, and she lifts her head and looks around now, rather than screaming to be flipped back over!

And that all brings us up to 22 weeks this week.  Still teething, with nothing coming up to stay (one tooth popped up and went back down 3 times but hasn't returned since) and she's still wearing her 18 month sleepers.  My little girl amazes me every day, and her smile makes my world.  Looking back at these photos and remembering what happened when, I cannot believe how quickly 5 months have flown by!  She'll be walking in no time!

My new Body

It took me a long time to get up the courage to write this post, and an even longer time to be okay enough with the situation to want to share.

I have never been thin.  Never.  When I was a baby my mom had issues with breastfeeding, so I was put on Formula, and ended up being a little butterball right from my earliest days.

  When I was 4 I was diagnosed with a very rare auto immune disease that I was treated with using Steroids, among other drugs, which plumped me up for several years.

When I was 12 I had a doctor take a look at my awful eczema all over my arms and legs, and proclaim he could cure it - putting me once again, on Steriods, which resulted in me gaining about 50 pounds in Junior High.  Since then, I have worked every day at trying to get it off again. 

I spent many years doing the Yo-yo thing, where my weight goes up, I fight it back down, a year later I'm up again.  It's exhausting. 

After so many years, as much as I wanted to be a smaller size of myself, I had sort of come to terms with my body - I was thick, with my semi flat stomach and bubble butt, my heavy legs and large arms, I knew my body, I knew which pants would work, which shirts to avoid, and had made peace with my shape. 

Then Inara came along. 

I had always thought that when my time came to be pregnant, that I would be pregnant EVERYWHERE.  Meaning I thought I would be one of those woman that get the very round face, and put on pounds on their arms, legs, bum, everything.  I was expecting to have to inform people of my pregnancy on a regular basis so they wouldn't mistake me for just being really over weight.  But much to my surprise - I didn't.  I was all belly.  You couldn't even tell I was pregnant from the back, and aside from not being able to close my pre-preggo pants in the front, I could still get them up and over the tush in the back.

Needless to say, I was pretty thrilled!  I kept thinking to myself that I would get rid of the weight in no time after Inara's birth, and that I would be back to toned and happy in a matter of weeks. 

Unfortunately what I didn't realize, was that my body would be changed forever.  Pregnancy, and then child birth re-arranges a few things on you.  The body you are left with, is not the same one you went into this whole experience with. 

The first, and most obvious change, was to my midsection.  Here's the thing about looking like you are carrying twins... it takes a LOT of skin to stretch out that far, and once the baby is out, and your uterus has shrunk back down, you are left with that skin - that sort of, deflated balloon paunch.  Mommy Tummy is a term you may have heard - this is what they are referring to.  9 months of stretching leaves  you with a lot of skin, and unfortunately it's all collected in a circle right around your belly button. 

It's one thing to lose pounds, and tone your muscles, but it takes a little longer to tighten skin.  Excercise and eating right, definitely helps, but it takes time.  I read a pregnancy book once that said 9 months to change your body, 9 months to put it back - so in thinking I could be in tip top shape just a few months after delivering my daughter was pretty naive of me. 

Another change I wasn't expecting, was the effect pregnancy had on my breasts.  Now I've never been large chested by any stretch of the imagination, but these days, I feel a little - deflated for lack of a better word.  At the beginning of my pregnancy I had jumped into another workout regime to get me in better shape and shed a few pounds, so I had my chest measurements taken down, and in those first few weeks I was thrilled to find my chest growing in inches, and I ended up growing a cup size, and sporting some full firm cleavage!  I knew they wouldn't last, I knew I would lose my awesome rack when Inara was born, but I thought I would go back to where I was, rather than end up with something completely new to me.  My breasts are squishy now, the firmness is gone, and I can no longer boast the cleavage I used to have without the help of a push up bra. 

Needless to say, this was a little difficult to deal with, and ended up being the cause of one of my breakdowns (see previous post).  After a shower one day, I put on a bra, and noticed the flatness of my breasts -  they didn't seem to be able to fill the bra cups anymore, and the curvature on the top was gone.  I cried.  It's a silly thing to cry about, but in those first few weeks when you don't feel like yourself anymore, its kind of sad to realize the body you once knew is gone too.  This was one of the main reasons I started opting for Sports Bra's.  A sports bra isn't made for cleavage and lift, it's made to support, and tightly flatten the girls down for any sort of activity you may throw at them, and I just needed to not notice my breasts at that point.  I even started sleeping in sports bra's, or t-shirts, just to hide my body away. 

Another change, was the lovely addition of stretch marks across my belly.  I had been doing so well, I went 36 weeks without so much as a mark, and then one day getting out of the shower I noticed a line on each side, the next day there were two, two days after that, 4.  They started sprouting up at an alarming rate in those last few weeks, and unfortunately, they don't vanish once the baby is born.  No, I still have them, and will always have them. 

Just below the stretch marks is my Cesarian scar.  My daughter's entry into the world.  A thick red curved line about 5 inches in length.  The skin around it is numb from my doctor cutting through the nerve endings.  

The night my water broke, I took a picture.  Just before heading to the hospital, I took one last shot of the belly in all it's glory:

At that point in time, I knew I was in for sleepless nights and crying babies, and more diaper changes than I knew what to do with, but I had no idea how much motherhood would change me. 

Once I was cleared to workout again 8 weeks postpartum, I got all set up, and took a bunch of before pictures so I could have something to look back at once I reached my goal, but I didn't workout that day.  I took one look at the pictures, and sat on the end of the bed and cried.  The extra skin from my pregnancy hung like a flap over my waist band, and the stretch marks were thick and purple all over my pale skin.  My breasts were small and flat, and I couldn't find one thing I loved about myself in those photos.  It was a hard day.  A day I wasn't expecting to be honest. 

Since that day, I've done a lot of work.  Work on my body, work on my diet, and mostly work on my self esteem.  I know I've grown a lot in the past couple months, and I think I'm now in a place where I'm not embarassed or ashamed of my new body, I'm proud. 

My body is amazing.  This body made the most perfect baby girl from scratch.  This body grew a person from a single cell.  This body was home to my daughter, it provided protection, and nutrients, it took care of her before I knew how.  My skin stretched as far as it needed to to hold my child, and the marks it bares are a symbol of it's strength.  This body created life, and not just any life - this body created the life of the most precious gift I have ever been given - this body created Inara.  And for that, I have nothing but love and gratitude for it.

This is my new body, it's not perfect, but it is Amazing.