If I thought I was ready to meet her last week - I'm even more doubly ready this week! Life just seems so much harder this week! Everything hurts! I'm still experiencing the pelvic pain, the back pain, the threatening calf muscle cramping pain, and the "air bubble trapped in ribs" pain on top of just over all having a hard time climbing stairs, getting up from the couch, and bending to pick something up, or put it away. You ever get that feeling the day after a killer workout, where all your muscles and joints seem to have seized up while you slept, leaving you gasping, panting, grunting and wincing just to haul yourself from your bed in time to empty your bladder in the morning? Now add in a 7 pound baby sitting on top of that full bladder to increase the sense of urgency, and you have my mornings! The other morning I told Ben that if this was a pre-cursur to how I'm going to feel after I deliver, I might have to have him bring the baby to me for feedings because I wasn't going to be especially mobile several times a night!
Pain aside though, I'm feeling pretty good. I'm still in a great mood, and I still waddle around the house rubbing my belly fondly - I think I'm sure going to miss it, although I would be thrilled to wear a shirt that covers my tummy again! I do find I'm a hell of a lot slower these days, and basic tasks like emptying the dishwasher now require breaks, and sometimes I just don't have it in me to bend over to put a pot in the lower cabinet, or stand on my toes to try to place something on the top shelf, so I end up leaving a couple things on the counters for Ben to deal with when he gets home. I've been doing the bare minimum around the house as I just don't have it in me to do more. It's not even that I'm tired, but that it takes so much more out of me to do the simplest tasks!
My sleep cycles have been weird at best.. Before I met Ben, I could easily live off of 4-6 hours of sleep a night - not ideal of course, but I had a pretty active social life on top of working 8-5 every day, so it was what it was. Ben on the other hand doesn't survive very well on that little sleep, and little by little he converted me to be a 10pm yawner needing at least 8 hours to be any sort of human the following day. And for the first 2 trimesters I was up to 10 hours or so with frequent naps, but now that I'm 10 times bigger, and 30 pounds heavier, I seem to be just fine with 4-6 hours again! ... I'm not exactly understanding the logic, however I have read in several books that it's my bodies way of getting me prepped for 2am feedings and such! Either way, it's a little weird to be wide awake at 4am, and not even feel tired! Especially since so many books are also telling me to catch up on my sleep because I'm going to need to conserve my energy for labour... it's kind of a catch 22... I just hope my little one decides that 10am is a good time to arrive as I know at least for Ben, a middle of the night rush to the hospital is not ideal!
Unfortunately our weather is a little less than ideal when it comes to rushing out in the middle of the night, as winter has hit Edmonton, and our streets are filled with fluffy white snow that is increasing accidents and drive times all over the place - lucky for us, our hospital is literally 6 blocks from our house, so that's less of a concern, but that's also assuming Ben and I are both at home when we hit "Go Time". I worry about Ben driving back from work in this weather when I go into labour, but I know he has a level head on him, and he would make sure he keeps his emotions in check behind the wheel - it just doesn't make me comfortable. I would prefer him be with me at that time, but it is what it is, we have bills to pay, and right now Ben's supporting all of us, so work needs to happen for him.
As for myself I handed in my car keys a week ago after a hormone fueled panic attack attempting to drive to the mall. I went out last tuesday on a very mild weather night (there was snow on the ground, but it was relatively warm and not really too slippery) and I ended up being a complete basket case! My wheels slid a couple inches on two turns before catching solid ground and I burst into tears! I ended up turning around and coming home - I didn't even make it to the end of my block, and I was crying my eyes out when I walked back into the house! Poor Ben must have thought I had been in the car accident of the century! But the truth of the matter is, all I could think of was what could have happened if I HAD been in an accident, and how that air bag was mere inches from the most precious cargo I've every had the privilege to transport. I hung up my keys then and there, and I've been most content to sit at home during the day, and run errands with Ben in the evenings instead. It's a bit more of a pain since I can't have all the grocery shopping and running around done before Ben gets home, meaning he has to work all day, and then has to go out at night too - but it is what it is, and that's just how it has to be these days.
It's funny what hormones will do to a person! If someone had told me last year that they were scared to drive in those same weather conditions, I probably would have laughed - I've driven on roads like that and worse time and time again - winter driving is not my favorite, and I'll freely admit I'm a nervous winter driver (Not because of my abilities, but of all the stupid people on the roads with me, who drive too fast, or don't know how to get out of a slide -etc), but short of an ice storm, I wouldn't have reacted to a brief slide like I did a year ago. Of course this also falls into the Momma Bear Protection thing too - as I would also never put my child in a risky situation, and to me at that time, I did not at all feel like I would be able to handle that drive. Thankfully, Ben fully understood my fears, and after letting me sob into his chest and calming me down, the next day he took me over to the mall so I could buy what I needed to. He even admitted that he feels better when I'm not sitting in front of the wheel with my giant tummy so close to the air bag as well! (Now whether or not he was just saying that so I didn't feel quite so ridiculous or if he really meant it - I don't care, he said it, and that's all that matters to me).
In baby news, I had my OB appointment, and on a scale of 1-10 (5 being "head to the hospital" and 10 being "push") I'm at a 1, which confirms that I am in early labour - but that doesn't really mean anything since this stage can last from hours to weeks... so basically... I'm still left waiting. However my OB did tell me that she will only let me be max 10 days over due - which means I will have a baby in my arms at the latest by November 16th. But at this point - there's really no news! I'm not much closer, and the days still seem to feel the same for me. Of course it's not uncommon to go from a 1 to a 4 and skip all the steps in between, or be told "nothing is happening today" and then be holding your baby an hour later. The body is an amazing thing. My bags are packed, Ben's got his cell phone on him constantly, and we're just taking everything one day at a time! One things for certain at this moment - she will have a November birthday now!
Recap!
How far along? 39 Weeks
Total weight gain: 33 Pounds
- Up 5! Eep! It usually
wavers around 30 though.
Inches gained in the waist: 12 1/2” (48” waist now!) ½” bigger, How am I STILL getting bigger?!?!
Inches gained in the waist: 12 1/2” (48” waist now!) ½” bigger, How am I STILL getting bigger?!?!
Maternity clothes? Not really, I think there are only 2 or
3 maternity shirts that still fit, my pants are sweats, or yoga pants that are
rolled down in the front to give my belly come breathing room. Mostly I wear men’s clothing these
days.
Stretch marks? Not as red/purple, but there are a fair
bit on the sides of my tummy!
Sleep: Short, but it seems
to be quality, I feel pretty good when I wake up – it’s just weird to me to be
awake early in the mornings! I was
expecting to sleep in till 9am on Mat leave since that has been my natural
sleep cycle for most my life (midnight to 9am) but that doesn’t seem to be the
case anymore!
Best moment this week: I can’t really pinpoint a specific
event, it was all good
Miss Anything? Lots of
things at this point – I miss the days when putting on shoes was easy – hell even
lifting my leg to put on sweat pants – I miss when that was easy too!
Movement: Her moves
are more like rolling over in bed – she doesn’t really kick these days, it’s
stretches, and rolls! It’s fun to
find the odd lumps sticking out!
Food cravings: Nothing.
Anything making you queasy
or sick: Nope
Gender: GIRL!
Labor Signs: bouts of
nausea that last a few minutes at a time, as well as lots of cramping and the
odd BH contraction. The signs are
becoming more normal, but no patterns yet!
Symptoms: What
don’t I have?!?
Belly Button in or
out? Still in! I don’t think she’s moving!
Wedding rings on or off? Off – I decided to pack away the replacement ring too. Just in case
Wedding rings on or off? Off – I decided to pack away the replacement ring too. Just in case
Happy or Moody most of the
time: Very Happy!
Looking forward
to: My little one’s
arrival!
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