Wednesday, July 25, 2012

25 weeks

Well I sure dropped the ball on this week!  I realized just now (that's about 8:30pm Wednesday night) that I didn't do a blog entry yesterday!  Whoops!

I guess time flies when you're having fun!

So I'm sitting down now, with my "chill songs" playlist on in the background, and I'm writing my 25 week blog entry.

Man - 25 weeks, that's 15 left to go!  Only 15.  And since I find time goes by faster when I'm working every day, lets subtract my working weekends from those 15, and I'm left with 7 weeks (all pretty much in October)  The next 15 weeks are going to FLY by!!!





And a close up on my hair too - since I still cannot get over the fact that my curls are gone... this look took much product scrunching and blow drying with a diffuser to achieve...




 So how am I feeling these days?  Actually pretty good.  I mean obviously I'm still big, but I started a prenatal workout class on Thursday, and you would be amazed at how awesome for the self esteem it feels to be in a room with 15 other pregnant ladies all gasping for air and waddling around.  I suddenly didn't feel so beached whale-esque as I was with my sisters!  The class itself was awesome too - our instructor is also quite pregnant, and at one point she said "And don't worry if this is hard to do - because I'm dying over here"  rather than a fitness instructor coming up with alternate moves for those fitness challenged while she makes it look so effortless doing the "more of a challenge" move, she straight out admitted to having a  hard time herself.  It was awesome.  We were all on the same page- and I completely understand why Jessica (the studio owner) only has the Bump and Groove class when she has a preggo instructor- it really does help to know she's in the same boat while she's asking you to do squats!   That being said, I feel like the ladies at the studio need to be on constant preggo rotation because that class is so valuable to so many ladies!!





The nursery is coming along too - now complete with insulation... on most of the walls anyway - we had to go back to get a different type of sound insulation for the wall that is shared with the bathroom... it's very noisy in the nursery when someone is running water of any kind in the bathroom - we figure we might as well do it right while the walls are open!  Currently the new insulation is sitting in the middle of the room, but I believe that's a project Ben wants to finish tomorrow night when I'm at Bump and Groove.  Then it's drywall, tape, mud, and paint!!!  I can't wait until I can start decorating!!

Speaking of decorating I bought a few things for the baby's room the other day!  I bought some fabric to make curtains out of, and I bought a watercolor print that I had had my eye on for months!  I'm excited to have the room finished enough for me to get in there and start furnishing it!!

Last night, Ben and I also filmed another Daddy Experience video - I quite enjoy these videos, as I get to just lay there while Ben does all the talking :) Check it out!  (and check out the other one's too - I'm pretty proud of my man!)



Anywho - here's the recap!


How far along? 25 Weeks
Total weight gain: 17 Pounds  -  Last week after my 6 pound jump, I then went back down 3 pounds, and then up again – it’s a fluctuating sort of a week
Inches gained in the waist: 8"    - same same
Maternity clothes? Yes!!
Stretch marks?  None that I can see anywhere!
Sleep:  I’ve been sleeping a little better – but I have noticed with the increase in size there has also been an increase in heat at night, and several times I’ve woken an hour or two after falling asleep only to throw the covers off of me in a frantic panic to cool down.   
Best moment this week:  Lump pulling my belly to one side to enjoy the purring of my kitty!   
Miss Anything?   Walking fast – I’m sure Ben misses it too – our walks are now peppered with much gasping and requesting to slow down. 
Movement:  Lots!  Her kicks and punches are much bigger now, and some feel like pushes or her sliding an appendage across my skin here and there – when they used to be just quick pops.  And the movement is starting to move a little more – she has discovered my bladder, and thinks its really fun to kick it when it’s swollen. 
Food cravings: This week it was garlic stuffed green olives – I could have eaten the entire jar the moment we bought it!!!   And I went through a lot of strawberries!!!  Mmm Fresh Fruit!  
Anything making you queasy or sick: Still just bad smells
Gender: GIRL!     
Labor Signs: Too early! 
Symptoms:  I pee like a pregnant lady, and I grunt getting in and out of the car.  Also I rub my belly and hold my sides when walking more often than not (it helps the cramping)
Belly Button in or out?  Still in, I attempted to take a picture of it today, but in every photo my belly button looked like a butt hole, so I opted not to share that one.  I was just trying to show where my belly button piercing was sitting these days – I think I’ll just show the people who want to see in person. 
Wedding rings on or off? Off, but I'm still wearing my "replacement ring" which is my old junior high ring from my parents.
Happy or Moody most of the time:  Very Happy!
Looking forward to:  Maternity Photos! 

Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Preggo Self Esteem

As the weeks roll by, and I get rounder and bigger, I have found that lately I've been struggling a little more with my self esteem.  Don't get me wrong - I love my belly, and I'm undeniably cute these days, but the vixen, womanly part of me seems to be lost among all the extra weight and water retention, and it's starting to get to me.

The other day I was trying to butter toast and popped the butter in the microwave for a few seconds to try to soften it up a little bit - which then resulted in the bulk of the butter still being hard, while the drippings at the bottom turned to liquid.  Of course, since I am Heather, I managed to splash my shirt with some of the butter.  As usual Ben chastised me about once again spilling something on my shirt, and I headed off to the mall to get a replacement shirt (normally I wouldn't have cared, but I had a shoot that night, and didn't want to look as slobish as I felt).

While waddling around the mall, I became increasingly aware of the fact that I'm no longer the person I used to be.  For starters, I waddle now, and I have for a while.  My belly (no longer my hips) shifts right and left with each step I take, and I find I have to arch my back just to keep my balance from the increased weight that is hanging off my midsection.  Then of course we can't forget the swollen feet and water retention in my legs that make for a killer set of gams that get admired everywhere they go.  Nor can we ignore the baby furnace I have inside me that keeps me "glowing" (otherwise known as sweating) all day long.  As well I'm sporting a 43" (and growing) waist, and when you put all that together, it's cat calls all day long!

I'm entering into a completely different status in my life - I'm going to be a mother.  I'm creating life, and anyone who looks at me can see that, and no one looks at me in a negative light because of that - quite the opposite actually, everyone loves a pregnant belly, and I get admiring looks from all over these days - however, it's from different people  for different reasons now.

There's nothing quite like turning heads in a mall, and feeling like you are the girl that people notice - but I'm having a hard time dealing with the change in reason.  It's not because I'm pretty, or have a smile that lights up the room, or that I have a nice body - it's that I'm going to have a baby - and there's nothing wrong with that, but I am struggling with only being identified as a mother these days, and not a woman if that makes any sense.

Compliments go a long way in any stage of life, and I'm missing the random one's about me - personally, about ME.  People don't comment on my eyes any more, they don't say that my hair looks great, or that I look awesome in my new jeans.  People talk about the baby, the belly, and ask me when I'm due.  I'm just feeling more like a vessel for this new person, than the woman I prided myself at being for so many years.


I will be the first to say that I was as excited as anyone to become pregnant and start this new chapter in my life, so I think that's in part why I'm so confused by how affected I am by the change in my self esteem.  It's not like I was ever up there with super models, or got bombarded by admirers the moment I left my house - not at all, I was pretty average to say the least, but I still got noticed here and there, and I guess I still just want to be thought of as gorgeous, or sexy now and again - rather than just cute and round - Baby Hippos are cute and round.  


I mean, obviously this is a hormone written blog post - and I'm just feeling emotional, and somewhat sorry for myself these days, but I always find I feel better when I get things down on paper (or keyboard in this case), so there you have it.  Take it as you will - I have little control over my feelings these days, and sometimes the "poor me" posts need to be written just so I can release some of this crap from off of my chest and get over it.

And now, back to your regularly scheduled programming...

Tuesday, July 17, 2012

24 Weeks

24 down, 16 to go!  I realized this morning that I'm just 3 short weeks away from my third trimester!  And I'm really starting to feel like it too!

As is evident from my photo's, I'm both a shower AND a grower, and I've been quite large right from the get go (in maternity pants at week 9!)  So I feel like I'm currently waddling around with an 8 month belly at my 6 month mark - I'm really starting to feel huge these days, too!  I walk slower than I ever have before - and often gasp for breath when going up stairs, or rushing to get somewhere (those compressed lungs are fun!), as well I'm working with some serious water retention, and my poor little feet are becoming little sausages!  A couple weeks back I had to forgo wearing runners that required tying, as reaching my feet was an issue, and now I seem to be having difficulties even wearing my flip flops as the straps are now putting a little more pressure on the tops of my squishy feet, causing tender spots!  

Along with my swollen feet, I seem to have a little more joint pain especially in my hip flexors when I sit for more than 30 minutes at a time - which made my flying 10 hour road trip to Sask and back this last weekend "interesting" to say the least.  (I think I'm still trying to recover).

But I do believe I've discovered the cause of my recent discomfort - let me show you:

This was last week (23 weeks - 42" belly, total weight gain: 12 pounds):


And this is a mere 7 days later (24 weeks - 43" belly, total weight gain: 18 pounds!):



Notice anything.... huge?  She grew... a lot.  You can also see my lovely swollen legs in the picture, as I'm retaining water as well these days, which is also part of the cause of the sudden 6 pound weight gain I experienced.  The salty fast food on the weekend road trip didn't help matters either (it was either eat salt, or pee at my regular 20 minute intervals - which would result in a lot of me awkwardly squatting in the ditch along the Yellow Head in Saskatchewan.  (Anyone who has driven that road knows that you are lucky if you manage to find a bathroom every hour and a half let alone every 30 minutes or so!).  I opted for Salt, and small sips of water, I've never been a pro squatter, and wasn't about to take the chance and accidently pee on myself.

The good news about this recent growth spurt, is that I'm at a place where I can finally book my maternity shoot with my favorite photographer (of course Melissa).  I've been looking forward to maternities with Melissa since I found out I was pregnant, and now I'm big enough to get some really nice photos (but not too big that I'm swollen in my face or I'm really really uncomfortable!).  I sent Melissa a picture of my belly last night, and said "Big enough for Maternities hey?"  She laughed and agreed, saying that mid Aug would be perfect for me, and some women have to wait for 8.5 months to get to that size :p  I'm an over achiever :)

Here's the recap:


How far along? 24 Weeks
Total weight gain: 18 Pounds  - Woo Growth Spurts, and Water Retention!
Inches gained in the waist: 7 1/2"   - Grew another inch in a week!
Maternity clothes? Yes!!
Stretch marks?  None that I can see anywhere!
Sleep:  I’ve been so exhausted by bed time I pretty much die when my head hits the pillow, and a couple times already this week I’ve been asleep before Ben even puts away his phone!  That being said, I don’t move the whole night, and when the alarm goes off in the morning, it still doesn’t feel like enough time! 
Best moment this week: Going to the farm to celebrate my dear Gido’s 90th birthday, and seeing cousins and family and talking about the baby and such – also my mom got to feel our little angel kick, and hear the heartbeat! 
Miss Anything?   Unlabored movement – there is no such thing as silent movement for me these days – panting and gasping is a given now! 
Movement:  Yes!!  My little Lump is kicking bigger and bigger each week!  I keep waiting for the moment I can see her! 
Food cravings: I really wanted a chicken wrap last night – and I had it, and it was delicious! 
Anything making you queasy or sick: Not really no
Gender: GIRL!     
Labor Signs: Too early! 
Symptoms:  I pee frequently, my ankles and feet are swollen, I’m huge, and walking requires frequent stops to wait out cramping and catch my breath.   
Belly Button in or out? In - Although the bottom hole from my belly button stud (that used to be deep inside my belly button) is currently about half an inch above my belly button now – so I think it’s only a couple more weeks before my innie becomes and outie… 
Wedding rings on or off? Off, but I'm still wearing my "replacement ring" which is my old junior high ring from my parents.
Happy or Moody most of the time:  Very Happy!
Looking forward to:  Maternity Photos! 




Tuesday, July 10, 2012

23 weeks - Start of Month 6

This week was so action packed - if I didn't schedule some much needed naps in there, I don't know that I would have made it through in one piece!

My little darling is kicking constantly now, several times a day - all of which are straight downward into my pelvis, - which I'm not sure that says about our little one's position, but I look forward to the day I see that adorable little foot slide across my tummy and really make it's presence known!  She's still not kicking enough to disturb my sleep or anything - so I'm not complaining!

The Heat wave that hit Edmonton is particularily uncomfortable for me these days - especially since I'm chugging cold water like it's going out of style - which means my already compressed bladder is working in over drive - I swear I should just sit in the bathroom and drink my water there just so I don't have to waddle back and forth every 10 minutes!  I also discovered that all of my summer dresses are made of ployester - whoever thought summer dresses should be made of this horrible fabic in the first place should be shot - but I also deserve a good swift kick for buying so many of these items as well!  I own one cotton dress - and it's a wrap dress that I'm not confident covers enough of my bum with my new larger than life belly, so I'm pretty self conscious about wearing that one these days.  Luckily I did invest in a couple pairs of maternity shorts, and they have been a godsend so far!

As you can see - there is a little more belly these days!  (Not bigger around, but I feel like it's bigger in general - it gets very round very high up now) - so I feel like I'm quite a bit bigger- especially since I'm starting to feel the pressure on my innards now!


But so far so good - I really have no complaints to make.  I still love being pregnant, and I still very much love my belly, even though it's starting to make reaching my feet a bit more of a issue now...  I would like to direct your attention to Exibit A - Ben is such a darling, he helped me clean the old nail polish off my toes just before a wedding last week because I couldn't reach any more!  (well I can still reach, just not for any period of time, and I end up gasping and grunting the whole time I'm leaning over)


And I'm trying to make the best of this heat...  And by heat I mean....


So naturally - pregnant or not - I'm not wearing a shirt to cut the grass outside - and the neighbours who don't like it, don't have to look!


Oh, and just for amusements sake - here's a dark grainy cell phone picture of how I usually find my little Lump first thing in the morning... As you can see, there's a reason I call her Lump:



Anyway - here's the recap!


How far along? 23 Weeks
Total weight gain: 12 Pounds  - Climbing every week now!
Inches gained in the waist: 6 1/2"   - holding steady! 
Maternity clothes? Yes!!
Stretch marks?  None that I can see anywhere!
Sleep:  Not great these days – the summer heat has us sleeping in the basement, which means Ben and I are sharing a Queen with my big Body Pillow, - and I find I just don’t have the same room to roll around and adjust that I do in the king – so I think tonight it’s back in the upstairs bed! 
Best moment this week: I got to see a few old friends and family who all took turns rubbing my belly and congratulating me! 
Miss Anything?   My usual walking speed – these days I’m definitely waddling, and my lungs seem to be feeling a bit of pressure lately as I find I’m out of breath very easily when Ben and I go for walks now. 
Movement:  Yes!!  Constant little kicks now!  It’s so great to feel! 
Food cravings: It’s probably the heat wave Edmonton is facing, but I haven’t really felt like eating much lately.  I still find that my “stuffed” feeling passes quickly, but I’m just not in the mood to eat.  …. Too hot! 
Anything making you queasy or sick: Not really no
Gender: GIRL!     
Labor Signs: Too early! 
Symptoms:  I’m peeing like a pregnant woman…  And I find I’m grunting a lot more when I try to roll over in bed – as well I discovered on the weekend that I have no concept of my actual size – which was evident by my thinking that I could slide behind someone’s chair, and getting stuck – or having to go on my tippy toes just to slide my belly past someone. 
Belly Button in or out? Still in, but I’m checking it daily (Ashton has request immediate notification when it “pops”)
Wedding rings on or off? Off, but I'm still wearing my "replacement ring" which is my old junior high ring from my parents.
Happy or Moody most of the time:  Very Happy!
Looking forward to:  Seeing my little one again!  (and seeing her a little chubbier!) And right now it’s looking like I’ll have another Ultrasound mid August.  


Tuesday, July 3, 2012

22 weeks

Today is 22 weeks!  This can only mean two things - 1) I did my weekly blog on time this week, and 2) It's already been 3 weeks since I found out I was having a little girl!  3 weeks!  That's the better part of a month!  Doesn't seem that long ago.  Man, I sound like a broken record these days!  I keep talking about how time is flying... but it IS!  That does tend to happen though - When the sun is out, the days, nights, weeks and especially weekends never seem to be long enough!  (I wonder how being pregnant over the winter feels if a summer pregnancy seems to fly by??)

Anyway, on to updates!  So as I mentioned in my last weekly recap, my little one hasn't been kicking very much - if at all, and it was concerning me, especially since all the books I have read keep saying from week 20 on "you should be feeling those little kicks by now" and so I was starting to worry, as pregnant woman have a tendency to do, that my little one wasn't developing on schedule, but it turns out - she's was just taking her sweet time getting to the kicking stage!  (I still think Lump is a fitting nickname for her!)

On friday of last week, I had an idea - the last time I felt my little one kick was 4 weeks prior and it was shortly after having sushi for lunch with lots of Wasabi, so I requested that Ben and I give it a go again and see if we could start off her movement!  Long story short - it worked!  My little one will either love spicy food - or curse me for putting her though the pain, but ether way, her little legs (or arms?) got moving, and she let me know she was doing just fine!

Since then, she's been kicking pretty regularily, so perhaps she just needed a reason to start!  As I type this (after enjoying my supper) my little one is kicking pretty steady, and I have a grin from ear to ear feeling those sweet little pops and flicks from within my belly!  Ben even got to feel our little princess's tiny feet going to work the other day (every time I've called him over this weekend, she stops moving when Ben puts his hand on my belly, and then continues her dance once he walks away)!  I got him to place his hand after one of her kicks, and within a few minutes I felt the pop and asked Ben if he felt it, and he said he did!

Now this is all very exciting because it's feeling like I have a moving living breathing being inside me!  Not just a bump growing out of my abdomen!  And a very big bump at that as my belly seems to be expanding at a quick pace these days!

See?


That there is a 42" waist in all it's glory!



Tonight Ben and I are going to "Queen Extravaganza" which is a sort of Queen Tribute concert being held at the Jube - but with a twist, this isn't just a random band that decided to specialize in Queen songs, but rather, these guys have been hand picked by Queen members to do their music justice!  I'm so excited!  It was a rather last minute thought, but I found out about the concert on Groupon, and bought up two tickets right away!  I've always loved Queen, and grew up with "the Best of Queen" CD in our car in any and all road trips!  So we're starting our Lump off right with her Musical upbringing - straight from the womb! 

Speaking of which!  It's about time to head to the concert!!  Here's the recap!!


How far along? 22 Weeks
Total weight gain: 11 Pounds  - Climbing every week now!
Inches gained in the waist: 6 1/2"  - ANOTHER Inch bigger around in a week!
Maternity clothes? Yes!!
Stretch marks?  None on the belly!
Sleep: Emmy's need to sprawl on my belly and chest at night is my current issue with sleep as of last night - but I'm hoping that's not an every night thing from here on in, or he's going to find himself sleeping on the couch behind a closed door from here on out!
Best moment this week: Lump is kicking up a storm now!!! YAY!
Miss Anything?   Not really, although the other night with friends they were enjoying a Tangerine Beer and it made my miss my summers of Crabby's Ginger Beer!  (Holy Alcoholic Batman!  Why is everything I miss Alcohol related?!?)
Movement:YES!  Lump moves!!  She kicks!  Possibly punches too!!
Food cravings: Still eating a lot, and constantly!
Anything making you queasy or sick: The Garbage isn't a good smell... 
Gender: GIRL!     
Labor Signs: Too early! 
Symptoms:  I move a little slower these days, and the back is hurting a little more often these days, due to the increased waisline, but it hasn't been a bad week otherwise!
Belly Button in or out? In
Wedding rings on or off? Off, but I'm still wearing my "replacement ring" which is my old junior high ring from my parents.
Happy or Moody most of the time:  Very Happy!
Looking forward to:  Just enjoying my time with my little one, moving around!